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Helpline by Neil Rollinson

Taken from Spanish Fly published by Cape Poetry

I love your calm, unhurried way, that sexy
lilt in your Irish voice as you take me,
line by line, through the nightmares
of my Autoexec.Bat and Config.Sys files.
We check the registry for clues,
The boot log, BIOS and System.Ini.
It's like love this language of DOS,
like talking dirty over the phone.
When I tell you it still won't work
you pause for a moment and moan,
like my hands have found the lush peripherals
beneath your anorak.
Well, you say, it seems your system
is corrupt, you'll have to wipe
your hard disc now and reinstall Windows.
I sigh down the phone. Do you want me
to take you through it? You ask.
You could make invalid page faults
and fatal exceptions sound romantic.
I look at your scibbled name on my pad.
Mary, take me gently, I'm all yours.

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